If you’re reading this review of Lionsgate’s new horror film “The Blackening“, it’s probably because you hate horror movies, and you’re a scaredy cat just like me. It’s cool … I get it! And if you still haven’t watched it yet, you’re probably wondering … “Is “The Blackening” scary? Like ACTUALLY scary? Or can my Black ass actually sit through this thang without shitting bricks?”
I got you boo.
Every time a Black horror or thriller film gets released I cringe because I know I need to watch it, but I hate them.
And not because I just “hate” horrors and thrillers. Nope, it’s because I’m a big-ass scaredy cat!
What I really hate is:
- the sight of blood
- seeing or hearing bones breaking
- being startled (aka jumping up outta my seat like I forgot the damn stove on)
- extreme violence (think repeatedly stabbing someone as if they ain’t already dead)
- racial incidents that are sure to trigger any Black person
- watching kids get hurt
And probably a ton of other shit!
But since it’s my duty to you, the culture (and myself) to review Black films all year round, I’m trying to make peace with the fact that this includes horror and thriller!
So Here’s A Quick Review Of “The Blackening” For Scaredy Cats
Is “The Blackening” Scary?
I watched “The Blackening” TWICE in theaters and yes … the second watch was just as fun as the first! So it’s really not that scary at all. There are a few jump scares, a few moments of suspense, and a few deaths. But it’s not gory, or so intense that you can’t enjoy it!
“The Blackening” has just the right amount of horror to make you gasp and scream at the screen, without making you wanna close your eyes and hide. Plus it’s funny AF, like slap yo mama funny, and hella interactive.
So you’re almost always too busy laughing or tryna answer the insanely hard, but hella Black questions, to really be scared.
This isn’t like “Swarm” on Prime Video! Which has a ton of blood, and death. Although, that’s also worth a watch too.
It’s really a fun film that we all can enjoy. Yes, even us scaredy cats!
Do I recommend watching “The Blackening” even if you hate horror flicks?
Abso-f*cking-lutely! I wouldn’t mind seeing it for a third time either. It’s that good!
I know it’ll be on digital soon, and then, of course, Blu-Ray and DVD, but you’ll wanna see this one on the big screen, around as many (Black) folks as possible because the in-theater experience is insane! Just listening to everyone else react for the first time after you’ve already seen the film, is highly entertaining! I still want a copy on Blu-Ray, simply because I love it so much!
But it’s absolutely worth shelling out some coins before copping it for your home theater. Just don’t choke on your popcorn while watching.
